I Can Haz Lover?

Ah, hot freshman, how hot you are, over there being knowledgeable and friendly...
I dunno, maybe it'll happen, mebbe not...
But I'll try, and as my friend put it, I won't stop short of drugging! (lol, jk, I'd feel too much like Merope, Voldy's mom)
But anyway, I guess this breaks the theme of self pity and stuff like that...Here, I'll try again.

OMFG I'M SO TIRED RIGHT NOW. NEED SLEEP IMMEDIATELY.
and it's true...I am, and I do!

The History of "Love": the trials and tribulations of the one who's been unlucky

Wow. Look at me. I'm unlucky in love.
Well, let's try again. Maybe we can learn from my history.

I was young and stupid...in kindergarten! I fell in "love" with this one kid, and then he showed me his penis during class one day...and I stopped "loving" him. The second, I stopped loving because he always wanted to cheat off of me on worksheets.

I was the transfer kid in the 2nd grade. I saw this black haired, deep voiced boy. I never talked to him, I don't think he knew my name...but I liked him. Aaaaaand then I told my friend and she promptly said "Ew!" and I stopped liking him.

In Junior High, this one kid asked me out. It lasted about a week, and we didn't try again. I later found out he was gay.There were other boys, before and after this one, but you know...they were the kind that never knew my name, except for when they needed answers...then they knew my phone number and everything...

High school came along...and I liked this one boy, a really tall boy. He was my lab partner for sophomore year...he was in my bio class for junior year, and senior year...he was basically in all my classes. So, imagine my discomfort when I tell him I like him...and I'm rejected. Sad right? Well, forget him. I went to prom all by myself, and I had an amazing time.

Freshman year comes about...and I immediately latch on to a guy...the most moody, antisocial guy I could ever hope to find. He's everything you don't want: a know it all, a jerk, a douche...and still, I fell in like. I came to accept that he's a douchebag, but I still flirt...as I am wont to do.

This year, my sophomore year of college, I promptly fell in like with my next door neighbor in my dorm...I think he's gay, but...you never know. People might surprise you sometimes.
Still, I'm gonna give up hope on that one, maybe get to know the one that I literally saw make rice on his own, but heat up some chicken nuggets for dinner. You know, the one that really likes South Park and has a tattoo on his shoulder. Maybe I'll even find out his name one day.

Everything I touch turns to shit.

Grades, people, clothes, assignments, furniture, locations, friendships, romances...
Everything I come in contact with fails. Oh no, not really. Every endeavor is what goes wrong.

Get outta my business

Who said I was going to sleep? eh?
Nobody told you to jump to conclusions. That thing you needed to get off your chest? No. I don't think it was bothering you in any way. I know for a fact that any bad grades that come my way are my problem and my problem alone, so you don't need to feel any responsibility for my actions. I may be sulky after I do get a bad grade. And? You're plenty sulky after your own bad grades. Aren't I allowed a little? Leave me alone.

I Try

I really do try my hardest not to be a shitty friend. I don't say mean things about you, I agree with you whenever I can.

If I tell someone I'm mad at someone else, because of random things they do that are slightly annoying, like chewing too loudly, or talking in the movie theater.

I really do try to stay impartial to people's morals, upbringing, manners of speech, etc. They say mean things? Okay, I mean, to each his own until someone is really hurt.

So when you want me to agree to complain about those very things, I try not to. I try to see the best in people, because sometimes it's not their fault.

So don't blow up at me because I'm not angry alongside you. Especially when you're being a shitty friend too.